How To Be The Best Maid of Honor

Your best friend calls you to say she has some big news – she’s getting married!  After the initial joy for her wears off, she then asks you the big question. “Will you be my maid of honor?”


You realize that you have a massive responsibility for making sure your friend has the day of her dreams, but it’s so much more than that. There’s organizing the other bridesmaids, planning the bridal shower and ensuring that you don’t let your friend down. For a split second you panic and think you’re not up to the job – but you are. You just need a few pointers to help you smash your role as the maid of honor.


First things first – dresses. While you may not get the choice of dress or color you’d prefer, the bride will value your opinion on which dresses to choose for everyone. This will be one of the biggest things you’ll face as you’ll likely have several women who each want something different, with different body shapes, etc. You’ll need to get used to biting your tongue and remaining calm under pressure.  Find out where you can learn more about being the perfect maid of honor.

The hen party

You will also be responsible for organizing the hen party. Hopefully you’ll know what your friend likes and dislikes, so if she is expecting a stripper but gets a weekend at a spa, you’ll be in big trouble. Ask your friend for ideas on what she wants, but also throw in a few surprises of your own.  After all, you need to make this a night to remember. Some great ideas for a memorable time include a city break, spa weekend, or just a great night out in your local town (maybe even with a stripper).

The speech – no surprises here

As part of your role, you’ll be expected to speak at the wedding. This is the time for all those great stories you have of your friendship, just maybe omit the really embarrassing ones that may shock her new husband. Keep the speech short and sweet – no one wants to hear you talking for fifteen minutes, however much you may want to. Be sure to include anything that will bring back lovely memories for the bride and remind her why she chose you to be her second-in-command.

Gift registry

You can also make sure that anyone who has been invited to the wedding has a copy of the gift registry, and knows where and what to buy. The sooner you can let everyone know, the better, as they can start planning which gift they are going to choose. As maid of honor, you will probably also want to buy the bride something special that you know will mean a lot to her and her new husband.

The wedding

Ok, so you’ve made it to the wedding and everything has turned out perfectly – but you can’t relax just yet. You find yourself checking to make sure the caterers have done everything right, and that the tables have been set just as your friend wanted. At this point, you feel as though it has become your wedding, but the end is in sight now and you can almost relax. As soon as you see your friend basking in the glow of her new marriage, you’ll realize it was all worth it to see her happy.

The most important thing to remember is that while you may be doing most of the duties, the day is not going to be about you (however much it may feel as though it has become your day!). Your friend will tell you everything that she wants, and will value your input on helping create the day of her dreams. If you are ever unsure about anything, then ALWAYS make sure you check with her first. Even if it’s the slightest little detail, you don’t want something like that to ruin her big day and maybe even your friendship. It can be a very stressful time, especially if the bride turns into bridezilla, but remember that it’s just the nerves and anxiety and that they’re probably feeling the strain.

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Sarah Ruhlman is the founder and editor of Sarah Sarah is a lifestyle blogger, online influencer and television personality. Email to connect and work together.

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