Break-Ups & the No Contact Rule
So, you’ve just broken up with your love of however many years and are desperately wanting their attention back…or you’ve just broken up with your love and are desperately trying to avoid their pathetic attempts at getting back together with you. Either way, and whatever your feelings are, maintaining a policy of no contact may be a better option. Here’s why:
Clearing your head. Cutting all contact will allow you to have the amount of physical, emotional and psychological distance you need to settle your feelings and to better understand the circumstances surrounding the break-up. This is crucial in being able to process all the information and feelings associated with your ex.
Hindsight is 20/20. Distance from your ex allows you to view the situation and the relationship from a whole new perspective. Reflecting on the past can bring you to a clearer and more rational conclusion about what has transpired and what steps are necessary to ensure a fulfilling future.
Healing. All of the above is part of a healing process that can usually only be achieved once you have totally separated yourself physically, emotionally and psychologically from your ex and from the relationship. If you remain too attached to the idea of the relationship or the person, you may risk an emotional relapse for which you will need to restart the entire healing process.
Ultimately, no contact is time for YOU to get yourself together in order to either move on with your life or to later re-establish contact once each party has healed and is ready. No contact is all about you, not the other person. A period of no contact is a time for you to take care of yourself and your needs while your ex takes care of themselves.